Course Description

Fundamentals of Authentic Relating is a 6 session online series exploring and practicing the foundational aspects of three major movements of attention within relating.

These three movements, which underpin all connection and intimacy, are that of: Listening, Expressing and Attuning.

Understanding these three movements, and developing the skill sets within each one, leads to an ever-increasing refinement of one's ability and capacity to create and maintain connection in any context.

This course is a practice heavy, experiential dive into somewhat simple, yet infinitely deep, aspects of relating. Understanding and practicing the skills contained in this course leads to an expansion in “relational intelligence”, the awareness of and ability to shape and direct attention within human interaction.

The development of this intelligence creates possibilities of increased experiences of intimacy, ability to provide emotional support for others, clarity in expressing desires and boundaries, enhanced negotiation and conflict resolution capacities, and the welcoming forward of more of the unique essence of yourself and those with whom you connect.

Course Objectives

The following skills are taught, practiced and developed throughout the duration of the course:

Listening

Receptive listening :: embodying the principles of presence, appreciation, non-judgment and spaciousness
Reflective listening :: how to validate and honour another's experience, providing them with the opportunity for deeper insight into self
Active listening :: utilising curiosity as a vehicle of navigation into the infinite universe of another

Expressing

Vulnerability :: expression connected to the intensity of authentic truth
Desire :: the driving force of who and what we are in the world
Boundaries :: how the space between us facilitates genuine connection

Attuning

Noticing :: bringing shared presence to the immediacy of the moment
Impact :: creating cycles of connection through acknowledging the impact of another’s expression within oneself
Resonance :: dropping into the experience of interpersonal harmony

Course Breakdown

The course takes place over 6 Mondays from July 20th to August 24th at 7-9pm AEST

Session 1 :: Monday August 31st :: Embodied Listening & Vulnerability

We will explore the powerful synergy between the skill of receptive listening and the expression of vulnerability, while setting up a safe group container for the course.

Session 2 :: Monday September 7th :: Reflection

Developing this listening skill leads to a magical ability to really have others feel seen and heard in your presence. There is an entire world of subtlety available to discover in this skill.

Session 3 :: Monday September 14th :: Curiosity

Curiosity is a relational navigational capacity that, when articulated with finesse, leads others to reveal their depths, creating the possibility of beautiful bonding experiences.

Session 4 :: Monday September 21st :: Desire & Boundaries

Tuning into your authentic "Yes" and “No"... with these skills we develop clarity on how to express our needs and wants in ways that can feel good to both us, and those with whom we are sharing them.

Session 5 :: Monday September 28th :: Noticing, Impact & Resonance

The development of attuning skills opens up the “we” space, the intersubjective field that lies between us as humans. Stepping into this field with others, even for a moment, can feel profoundly nourishing, expansive and transformative.

Session 6 :: Monday October 5th :: Closing & Celebration Circle

The nature of this course creates a deeply intimate group space between the participants. This last session is an opportunity to consciously and safely step out of this shared field while reflecting on the learnings, insights and experiences that have occurred and celebrating and appreciating the journey we took together.

Course Inclusions and Expectations

6 x 2 hour online sessions using the Zoom platform
Access to a community of like-minded participants eager to grow and learn, through social media group platforms
15-45 minutes practice ‘homework’ per week within the community
Practice manual describing each of the practices shared during the course
Edited recording of each session (personal shares are omitted from the recordings to maintain group safety)

About the Facilitator

I’ve been studying and facilitating relational practice for 10 years now.

What is being presented in this course, however, is my own set of distinctions based on my experiences and experimentation. I have a variety of teachers, many from the US that I have learnt from and a number of different ‘schools’ I’ve learnt in. I draw from learnings in Authentic Relating (Authentic World, Authentic Man Program), Circling (Integral Centre - now closed, Circling Europe), Facilitation (Diane Hamilton from 10 Directions), Integral Theory (Ken Wilber) plus much much more including study in martial arts and embodiment.

I also have a small background in psychotherapy (postgraduate certificate) and the teachings are grounded in psychology understanding, particularly Attachment Theory (which is only mentioned but not explicitly worked with in this course), developmental psychology (Robert Kegan, Clare Graves, Suzanne Cook-Greuter, Terri O’Fallon - which informs the practice through understanding development however not mentioned at all in this course, will be topic of later courses) and interpersonal psychotherapy (Karl Rogers, Eugene Gendlin: however we are definitely not doing therapy, even though many of the practices and techniques come from there).

There is a lot more behind the scenes, and if you want to know more please feel free to reach out.

- Damien Bohler

Contact the host of Fundamentals of Authentic Relating 3