What is a kinky jam?

A kinky jam is a sex-positive and BDSM space where you can chat, meet people, and play. This one is a special edition to celebrate the end of the jams after one year together.

We will start by a social hour from 3pm to 4pm when you can chat and socialize, then I will give a speech and we will all share a special cake to celebrate the anniversary of the jams, after that we will have the pleasure to assist to a cabaret with performances by jams participants! After the cabaret you will be free to play and enjoy the space.

Impact and bondage tools will be available for you to use, such as floggers, plastic film, canes, a straight jacket, bats, handcuffs and more!

If you want to propose a performance for the cabaret please contact me on fetlife or at laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com. The tickets are free for the perfomers!

Bring some non-alcoholic drinks and snacks to share with the group! This is a sober space so alcohol or other recreational substances are not allowed. You also need to be soberish when you arrive. It’s ok if you had a beer before coming but you need to arrive with a clear mind.

When can you arrive?

The doors will be open from 3pm to 4pm.

If you want to arrive after that please send us a message at laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com or on Fetlife.

What to expect?

This is a special edition as we celebrate the end the events together but the core of the jams stay the same!

This event is inspired by the burn and the Parisian sex-positive community. This is a co-creation space. We give you a framework and you’re free to do whatever you want inside of it.

The sommeliers are here to guide you during the event and be sure that the framework is respected. You can ask them as many questions as you want connected to the event. They can explain to you how to use a bondage equipment, bring reassurance if you’re nervous, help people who came alone to not stay alone, ensure that the interactions are consensual etc… The sommeliers are not here to play. They will only be here to supervise the jam. They are allowed to do quick play with people they already knew outside of the event.

To help you meet people to play or chat with we will propose you to wear a tag with how you want to be called, your pronouns, and your intention for the jam. (e.g Play, Give, Receive, Chat, Meet new people, Play with people I already know, I have no fucking idea…)

There is no dress code! Feel free to wear whatever makes you feel comfortable. Kinky, sexy, casual or else! Nudity is permitted during sessions. For the social part please wear at least underwear (toplessness permitted).

Consent is one of the core values of this event. We will check with you if you read the consent section when you arrive by asking you to name one of the consent principles listed below. A negotiation guidelines document will be available, which will be mandatory to follow before playing with a new person.

If you have a specific trigger (a practice which puts you in a panic state if it happens in the same room as you) you can contact me about it (laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com or on Fetlife) and I will see if we can accommodate you.

Mindful light vaping is permitted inside.

What’s the price and why?

The ticket is £25 (for the first 10), £30 (for the 15 next) or £35 (for the last 10) per person (+Humanitix fees). It will cover the renting of the venue (£250), the purchase of new tools, the purchase of other equipment, the help of the sommelier (£61.05) and my work (£101.68). The details of the budget will be sent to you after the event to let you know what we did with your money!

If you are in a precarious financial situation, please contact me on Fetlife or at laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com I might be able to give a few reduced price tickets.

What’s the venue?

The venue is at Anatomie studio, a shibari space in the South East of London (closest tube station is Queens Road Peckham on the Overground) who also rent their space to sex-postive events. It’s a big warehouse space with a main room covered in mats, a small kitchen, two toilets downstairs, and a chill mezzanine space upstairs. This is a shoe free event. There is no outside space.

Most of the venue is step free beside the mezzanine. For wheelchair accessibility questions please contact me at laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com or on Fetlife.

Who am I?

This event is organised by Meow. I'm a little parisian kitty cat who loves impact play and who wants to bring a bit of the Parisian scene to London. My pronouns are she/her. I've organised BDSM weeks in France and I've been an active member of the French BDSM and sex-positive community since 2020. I also work as a community manager for a sex-postive company and I give beginners classes for a French BDSM school. I was the consent lead of my barrio at Nowhere in 2024 and I was part of the consent team at Nest in 2025.

Consent

Consent applies to kinky interactions but also social interactions such as touching, hugging, proposing food, topic of discussion…

Consent has to be:

Specific: A yes for touching an arm is not a yes for touching a butt.
Explicit: Maybe = no; No answer = no; Unclear answer = no; Contradictory body language = no.
Beforehand: Ask before the interaction + try to talk about all the possibilities, create a framework in which we can interact.
Revocable: Anybody can change their mind at any time before or during the interaction.
Informed: Clarify as much as possible, be sure that everybody knows what we are talking about, explain the intentions, the risks and share any useful information.
Determined: Be sure the other person is enthusiastic or at least has a confident attitude and open responses, instead of shifty eyes, an awkward smile or closed responses.
Non-negotiable: Don’t try to negotiate to make the person change their mind. Giving into something is not consent.
Personal: Consent is for yourself. For a group interaction you need consent from each person of the group.
Freely given: Be aware of potential biases, try to expose them to make them less strong but keeping in mind they can’t disappear (authority, seniority, notoriety, group pressure, desire not to have come for nothing, gender, sex, age, social class, financial situation, ethnic origin, religious affiliation, education, language ability, disability, conformity to beauty standards…)

What can we do to help consensual interaction?

Breaches of consent can happen fast and are rarely intentional. Almost no one wants to do a breach of consent but it still happens. It could be from anyone. So please keep in mind if you want to avoid it you will have to be careful. Question yourself and deconstruct what you have learnt.

It’s hard to say no! Try to make it easier: Verbalize the possibility of saying no. Be thankful for a no or refusal. To allow people to express their consent it’s important to encourage the no. Nobody should fear the consequences of a no or feel guilty about saying no. A no is a gift because nobody should want to interact with someone who doesn't want it. Give some time and space after a proposition. Do something else and let the person come back to you if they are interested.
Be careful if you want to join a group: Group pressure can be hard. If you want to join a group interaction, leave some space for the group to discuss what they want. Don’t interrupt a group who are in an intense interaction.
Make a negotiation before the interaction: A sheet with steps to follow will be provided to you.
Propose to use non-verbal consent communication during the interaction: Double tap = This touch is not ok ; Triple tap = Stop the interaction with person ; Redirect = I move the touch to another place (not redirect to a more intimate part)
Check often during the interaction if everything is ok, especially with people you don’t know well. To make it simpler for the person to stop the interaction you can use a question where the answer “yes” will stop the interaction. “Do you want to stop?” instead of “Do you want to keep going?”.
Avoid asking to add a new practice during the interaction, especially with a new partner because the consciousness can be altered especially in BDSM interactions. You are welcome to remove things but not to add new ones.
It’s always nice to check a few days after, especially after an intense interaction.

Contact

If you have any questions please contact me at laurane.schutze.pro@gmail.com or on Fetlife.

Contact the host of Kinky Jam - Last edition

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