Open Community Potluck Sunnyvale May3 at Rose's

Come gather and share stories and experiences of non-monogamy, relationships, and community; Whether you're simply curious, attending to support a friend/partner, or if you are actively practicing some form of non-monogamy. Experience with non monogamy is not required to attend.

We welcome all to attend, straight and LGBTQIA+

The organizer of this community values consent, honesty, authenticity, vulnerability, kindness, and accountability. Communication is a critical element of all connections, so we're here to practice connecting in our safer space we've cultivated. We hope that you feel welcome and at home here. 

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Please read all of the community rules and safer space guidelines below before attending your first event. 

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CAPACITY

This is a good sized event space, so we will have capacity for 30 people. Tickets required. 

This event is posted on multiple different sites (Humanitix, Meetup, Bloom) 

LOCATION

Open HQ : 775 San Diego Avenue, Sunnyvale

Hosts: Rose and John

ACCESSIBILITY

Small steps into house, stairways to get to upstairs rooms (optional). Steps into the backyard porch / garden area.

PET

No pets currently. Service animals welcome. 

WHEN ARE THINGS HAPPENING?

If this is your first event, arriving on time is essential so you can attend opening circle. If you will be late and miss opening circle, we prefer you reschedule for a future visit. If you have attended before and will be late, let a host of other attendee know so that we can expect you.

7:00pm - 8:00pm: Socializing and Potluck Food Time

8:00pm - 8:15pm Opening Circle - Rules, Topic

8:15pm - 9:15pm: Small group discussion time - Break into small groups to share thoughts on the topic or choose your own.

9:15pm - 9:30pm: Closing Circle - Share your thoughts and experiences with the larger group.

9:30pm - 10:00pm: Freestyle socializing

DISCUSSION TOPIC

1. Authenticity
   1. What are core characteristics, hobbies you enjoy, ways of being that are a reflection of your authentic self? 
      
   2. Are you able to be your authentic self in all aspects of your life, or only certain ones, or with certain people? 
      
   3. When / where do you feel you are able to be your most authentic self? 
      
   4. Where is it not easy to be this way, in what ways do you feel you are out of alignment with who or how you want to be? 
      
   5. In what scenarios do you not feel unable to be your authentic self, because it does not feel right, safe, or positive to do so?  
      
2. Change, Growth
   1. How have you changed/grown since beginning this relationship/lifestyle journey?  Are you aware of any growth opportunities you have before you?

POTLUCK FOOD

This is a dinnertime potluck event, so bring food/drinks to share.

Potluck sign up will be posted here closer to the event date

Your potluck contribution can be home cooked or take out. All options are much preferred to 5 different types of chips and dip, so please check the potluck sign up before grabbing your food. If you want a challenge, there are usually people attending who would appreciate Gluten Free, Vegetarian, Keto, or Low Sugar foods.

PARKING

Street parking is very accessible.

DRINKING/SMOKING

Smoking cannabis outside is OK, please refrain from smoking cigarettes before or during the event, the host is very sensitive to the smell and it can cause her acute nausea.  Alcohol is OK in moderation.  That said, smoking and drinking are not a focus of the event. 

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COMMUNITY RULES and GUIDELINES
CONFIDENTIALITY

• Everything shared in this group should be treated as confidential and private.
• Do not greet people outside of this group in a manner that would out them.

CONVERSATIONAL CONSENT

• Be aware of your conversation topics and who around you can hear them. Explicit conversations you may feel comfortable talking about or hearing may cause other attendees to feel uncomfortable or unwelcome.  If you are unsure of whether or not your conversational topic will be welcome by all within hearing range, checkin/ask the nearby people, or find a more private location, or table the conversation for a later time. 

CONSENT AND RESPECTING BOUNDARIES

• At this event you may see hugging, kissing, and cuddling. Do not assume that what someone does with other people will be comfortable for them to do with you.
• Always ask for consent when entering someone’s personal space.
• Hard cruising (flirting with as many people as possible, asking for people's contact info or for a date whom you have just met without obvious mutual interest) at these events is a hard NO. Getting to know people is great, but don't be pushy. That kind of energy is not welcome here.

HOLDING SPACE FOR EACH OTHER
If you feel comfortable doing so, hold space for each other. Holding space means letting others speak their truth, without assumptions, judgement, unwanted advice, or trying to fix them. Sometimes this is the only place where someone can have space held for them to simply be and express what they are experiencing.

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SAFER SPACE GUIDELINES

We strive to provide a “safer space” for community members. What do we mean by “safer space”?

In short, a “safer space” is a place where behavioral guidelines support each of us in guarding each person’s self-respect and dignity, a place for open and honest communication, where one has the freedom to speak or not to speak, where one takes responsibility for recognizing one’s own triggers as well as how (and when) other people are triggered, where confidentiality, empathy, and compassion are encouraged and difference is accepted.

Our “safer space” guidelines CANNOT AND DO NOT guarantee your safety, nor do they guarantee that you will always feel safe.

Each of us is responsible for setting and communicating clear boundaries when engaging with people at events. All attendees must respect the physical and personal boundaries of other attendees at all times.

Keep in mind that you can make someone uncomfortable without intending to do so. Comments that may seem innocuous to you can be painful to others. Light touch, hugging, cuddling, and other seemingly innocent forms of physical contact can be offensive or alarming when such touch is given without explicit permission.

Pro-Tip for new attendees: Circulate at events. Be graceful. If you’re enjoying talking to someone, give him or her the opportunity to exit the conversation anyway.

We do not tolerate harassment of any kind. If you harass someone, you will be asked to leave and may be banned from future events. Harassment includes (but is not limited to) making unwelcome sexual advances; making comparative comments about age, race, religion, nationality, sexual expression, gender expression, sexual orientation, weight, or lifestyle; touching, photographing, or recording people without their explicit permission; demanding contact information from others; deliberate intimidation; mockery; stalking; following; and sustained disruption of events.

We believe that most people who attend our events do so without ill intentions. However, if you experience or witness inappropriate behavior, please bring it to the attention of the organizer, host, or a person at the event that you feel safe with.

All attendees are expected to read, understand, and practice the community rules and safer space guidelines. Activity or behavior that goes against these rules and guidelines may lead to revoked attendance privileges.

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VOLUNTEER at Open Community Events

Feeling grateful for this community and want to do more? Volunteers are always welcome! We happily accept help at each event with facilitation and overseeing the flow of the evening, reading the community rules during opening circle, volunteers to welcome new attendees, as well as dish washing and clean up volunteers.