Vetting for Pain with @Ms_Kitten_: A Practical Framework for Intensity
Event description
Vetting for pain-based play is not about finding the toughest partner or proving how much intensity you can take. It is about understanding the body, understanding capacity, and understanding the variables that decide whether a scene becomes grounding, expansive, overwhelming, or destabilising.
This class is built from my own experience as a masochist, a bottom, a switch, and an educator who has spent years studying how pain is processed in real bodies over time. It is not a one true way. It is a framework created from my lived experience, the patterns I see repeatedly in my work, and the research I rely on to keep myself and my partners safe.
What This Class Covers
1. Why Vetting for Pain Is Different
Why two scenes that look identical from the outside often land very differently in the body.
How context, chemistry, life stress, and physical readiness shape outcomes long before the first strike lands.
2. The Physiology of Hurt
A clear explanation of what actually happens in the nervous system during pain.
Why the body does not distinguish good pain from bad pain in the moment.
How hormones, stress load, sleep, and personal history change your ability to metabolise intensity.
3. What You Are Actually Vetting
Not “can they hit safely,” but:
• regulation ability
• somatic awareness
• communication under stress
• pacing and containment
• ability to adjust load
• long-term reliability
4. The Six Filters of Pain Vetting
My personal structural approach to assessing:
• motivation
• competency
• communication
• containment strategy
• aftercare and integration
• pattern stability over time
This is not a universal formula, but it is an effective, adaptable framework.
5. The Seventy Two Hour Window
Understanding what happens after the scene.
How to recognise chemical crashes, delayed dysregulation, emotional rebound, and early indicators that intensity exceeded capacity.
6. Self-Vetting: Your Own Readiness
Tools for identifying whether your body, mind, and life context can safely hold the scene you want.
How shifting baselines impact resilience and pain literacy.
7. Green Flags and Red Flags
Patterns I trust and patterns I no longer ignore.
8. Building Your Own Vetting System
How to adapt and customise these frameworks to fit your body, your relationships, and your dynamic.
Who This Class Is For
• bottoms exploring their pain capacity
• tops wanting reliable, practical vetting methods
• switches expanding their pain literacy
• players wanting consistent, sustainable outcomes
• anyone wanting more clarity and less risk in their play
All roles and experience levels welcome.
This is an education class, not a technique demonstration.
What You Will Leave With
• a structured vetting framework you can use immediately
• practical scene-planning tools
• improved communication and risk assessment
• post-scene evaluation strategies
• expanded awareness of your own capacity patterns
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